Universe, meet Beryl the Brahman cow.
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
I know what you’re thinking. “Wow, I don’t even deserve to look upon this cuteness. I am unworthy.”
And you’re absolutely right. While we’re over here making life generally unbearable for most living things, Beryl is chillin’ in Australia just being the best. This little nugget was orphaned when her mother died just two days after she was born and she’s been through a lot.
So what does she do? She milks it. She milks her humans for all they’re worth and deserves every second of their pampering.
Here are some of her favorite activities. First and foremost, she’s really into hiding from everyone’s bullshit.
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
Side-eyeing is her specialty because of course it is.
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
Her most favorite thing in the world is getting some nice scratches while also turning her nose up at your garbage.
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
By the way, she’s coming inside. Just kidding, she’s a cow. Cows don’t belong inside.
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
Read More: We’ve Seen Plenty Of Adorable Foster Parents Before, But This One Takes The Cake
WRONG. IT’S FUNNY HOW YOU THINK THAT.
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
Beryl loves being inside. See how she doesn’t even care about your feelings?
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
Here she is watching some TV. She’s also wondering where in the sweet, unholy hell her popcorn is. Humans. They’ll never learn.
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
She often wonders why people are so convinced she’s not a dog. They look exactly the same.
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
See? Definitely a dog.
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
Just three dogs doing dog stuff.
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
“Ah yes. That’s the spot, gentle peasant.”
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
But at the end of the day, Beryl’s favorite thing to do is subtly remind everyone that she’s better than them. Bask in her glory while she still lets you.
Facebook / Beryl the Brahman
I told you you’re inferior! Keep getting down with your bad self, girl. For more Beryl, be sure to follow her on Facebook. You know you want to.